Thursday, May 30, 2013

A night spent with Vin Diesel and The Rock studying the manly arts

Last night myself and some brethren journeyed out into the wilds of the Philadelphia suburbs to see the ode to masculinity that is “Fast & Furious 6,” or as the opening credits dubbed it “Furious 6.” True story.
                All these hours later, I still can’t tell if that’s cool or not.
                Whatever you’d like to call it, this movie picks up where its predecessor, 2011’s “Fast Five,” left off.
                Don’t worry. I’m not going to summarize the other four installments of the franchise, because, well, I haven’t seen them. Until The Rock joined the franchise in part five, it wasn’t even on my radar. After all, I know nothing about cars and I drive super slow, so what could a franchise dedicated to folks who live their lives a quarter mile at a time hold for a guy like me, who lives his life doing 5 under the speed limit?
                But then they hired The Rock and everything changed. Part five saw our hero Dom Toretta (Vin Diesel) and his lovable gang of street racers and thieves doing battle with a sinister Brazilian drug lord, while being pursued by a relentless and heavily muscled cop (The Rock).
                Spoiler alert: The anti-heroes beat the drug lord by working with the cop, a tenuous bond is formed and we all go our separate ways. Until now.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Ending one chapter, beginning another

A little over 2 ½ months ago, my previous blog, The Cheese List, came to a rather unceremonious end.
                For somewhere in the neighborhood of 2 ½ years – funny how that worked out – I did my best to find the worst movie of all time. There were weekly reviews, there was news, a “Transformers” marathon and there were even lists for a little while.
                After all of that time spent blogging on the dregs of Hollywood, I learned a few key lessons.
                One, man was not meant to subsist on cheesy movies alone. Sadly, I only had time for a finite number of movies a week, usually that number was in the neighborhood of one.     
Because of that horribly imbalanced diet, I learned that only watching horrible movies can do a real number on a person’s soul.
I also learned that the longest I can commit to daily, and by daily I mean workweek daily, posts is about six months. Considering my previous relationships prior to my present one each lasted about three months, I’d say six months is pretty damn awesome.