Babies and weddings or what to expect when you put them on the guestlist

blog.timesunion.com

So this blog entry is going to be about babies. Again. Sorry, but this is what happens when you start getting old.

            Even if you don’t have an actual human baby to cart around, babies somehow find start playing a bigger role in your life. People you know have them. Those same people expect you to interact with the baby. They want you to hold it, fawn over it, call it cute and such.

            I was at a family member’s wedding the other day. It was a pleasant affair. There was boozing, dancing, cheesy wedding music. Good times.

On the list of cons was the unfortunate church ceremony, but whatevs. To each their own on the subject of religion.

Another con? One of the bridesmaids had a baby. So naturally, this meant the baby had to be very, very involved in the process of helping my cousin and her boyfriend join their lives together as one in the eyes of the church.

Because obviously, duh. Wherever babies go, their parents just assume people want the little monsters involved and heavily.

So really my problem isn’t with the baby itself, more so the parents. What a not-so-shocking twist.

Girls and babies: A match made in heaven or an endless and vicious battle?

blogs.fgcu.edu

I’m an animal person. Not only your usual human companions like dogs and cats, but pretty much every kind of creature that walks, hops, flies or slithers around.

                Well, maybe not so much that slither part. Snakes are fine, just as long as they’re a good distance away from me.

                I like animals. A good deal. I’ve been known to exclaim “Puppy!” anytime I’m driving and happen to pass a person walking a dog. Regardless of whether or not anyone is in the car with me to hear it or if the dog is old enough to be my father.

                It’s just the way I do business.

                One thing I’m not super into? Babies. Human ones.

                I don’t dislike babies, by any means. I just don’t find them as appealing as animals. I respond to a baby in a room the same way I do a coffee table: It’s just a thing that’s there. It’s not adding to or distracting from my life experiences.

                I wasn’t raised around a ton of babies so I don’t really know what to do with one when it’s around or how to interact with it. I’m not quite on the level of Schwarzenegger in “T-2,” but maybe just a hair below.

                Babies and I aren’t on the same page, but like I said, I don’t have a problem with them.

Something I do have a problem with? Girls and babies.